The PAYDAY Theory
A shitty pasta made by Handsome Jerk in about 30 minutes.
Do not enjoy.
IT BEGINS
Okay, so we all know about the PAYDAY series, right? 2 games about robbers in MURICA. But there is a dank secret within the game that I will expose.
DA THEERY
In PAYDAY: The Heist, there is a devil mask for Wolf. This proves that he is evil swedish robot robber technician game dev super Stan, who fights against the good Almir in the sky. But wait, there's more! The Overdrill has a 32000 second timer. Remove 31444 and you have 666. This is proof that the drill, Bain and Wolf are demonic. But Dallas can't be bad, he has the 'MURICA mask, right? WRONG! He is evil because my friend says Obama took candy from a kid! He is totally trustworthy! I have totally researched this! Hoxton is a good because ENGREND. Then the evil weeaboos will take over with the new DLC. Speaking of DLC, remove the C and you have two of the letters in Devil. This is proof that Overkill games is demonic and evil. Hoxton always goes out of custody because he can't die, the game won't let him because [insert dubiousdugong purple prose here]. That totally makes sense and is not made up. John Wick is jesus because Keanu Reeves is immortal!!!11!!!!! Totally not made up! The train heist level is evil because TF2 is demonic and the heist is a TF2 reference!111 All the heists are evil because they have references, and as we all know, all media is demonic! Even christian media! It's true! My friend Tinfoil hat Teddy told me this, and he is never ever wrong! I swear you guys! Everything is the truth! I am Cole, I am captured in Wolf.EXE's hell dimension and I am telling you this through skype! Please believe me! OH NO HE'S AFTER MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-
Oh wait. It's a pasta, I can still write while dead. Oh well!